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Archive for May, 2008

Nude Maid Cleans Him Out

May 30, 2008 By: Woody Category: Fun Stuff No Comments →

(05-28) 19:38 PDT Tampa, Fla. (AP) –

A nude maid is accused of really cleaning up at a Florida man’s home. The Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office said a 50-year-old man hired the maid from the Internet on Friday to clean his Tampa home.

Authorities said the woman arrived at the home in a one-piece, light colored dress. She took off the dress and cleaned the house for $100-per-hour. Sheriff’s office spokeswoman Debbie Carter said the man told deputies he left the maid alone in the bedroom to clean.

When the man’s wife came home from vacation, she discovered $40,000 in jewelry missing from their bedroom.

Things You Always Wanted To Know

May 29, 2008 By: Woody Category: Fun Stuff No Comments →

1. Hitler and Napoleon both had only one testicle.

2. In America you will see an average of 500 advertisements a day.

3. It’s illegal in Newcastle, WY to have sex in a butcher shop’s meat freezer.

4. In ancient Rome, when a man testified in court he would swear on his testicles.

5. Jaguars are frightened by dogs.

6. Holland has the densest population per square mile of any nation in the world.

7. In Alaska it is illegal to whisper in someone’s ear while they are moose hunting.

8. It takes about 48 hours for your body to completely digest the food from one meal.

9. It’s against the law in Willowdale, Oregon, for a husband to curse during sex.

10. Honey is the only food that doesn’t spoil.

11. Human tapeworms can grow up to 22.9m.

12. It’s been estimated that one out of every two hundred women is born with an extra nipple.

13. In Atlanta, GA, it is illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.

14. Horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants in Marshalltown, Iowa.

15. It takes 17 muscles to smile and 43 to frown.

16. In Britain, failed suicides were hanged in the 19th century.

17. If a child burps during a church service in Omaha, Nebraska his or her parents may be arrested.

18. It takes a lobster approximately seven years to grow to be one pound.

19. In a lifetime the average US resident eats more than 50 tons of food and drinks more than 13,000 gallons of liquid.

20. In California, animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.

21. Hamsters blink one eye at a time.

22. If a person has two thirds of their liver removed through trauma or surgery, it will grow back to the original size in four weeks time.

23. Human thigh bones are stronger than concrete.

24. In Arkansas it is illegal to buy or sell blue lightbulbs.

25. If Barbie were life-size her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet two inches tall and have a neck twice the length of a normal humans neck.

26. Hondas and Toyotas are the most frequently stolen passenger cars because they have parts that can be readily exchanged between model years without a problem.

27. In 1386, a pig was executed by public hanging for the murder of a child.

28. Humans are the only animals that use a smile as an emotional response.

29. When a small amount of liquor were placed on a scorpion, it would instantly go mad and sting itself to death.

30. Homosexuality remained on the American Psychiatric Association’s list of mental illnesses until 1973.

How Long Should A Fuck Last?

May 18, 2008 By: Woody Category: Fun Stuff No Comments →

The best sex should last between seven and 13 minutes, and even three-minute sex is “adequate”, a major survey of US experts has concluded.But Australian sex therapists commenting on the new research say most men Down Under wanted it to last considerably longer while most women were “not bothered” if it was over with fast.

The sex study is the first to review what the experts believe is the ideal length of time to have penetrative sex, with the random sample of Americans and Canadians labelling seven to 13 minutes most “desirable”.

Intercourse lasting between three and seven minutes was deemed “adequate”, but anything less was “too short” and beyond 13 minutes was “too long”.

The study, published today in the international Journal of Sexual Medicine, is designed help calm couples’ unrealistic beliefs that healthy sex should last a long time.

US studies show Americans expect penetrative sex to last between 15 and 20 minutes, even though sel- reports indicate it is over in less than half this time.

Lead researcher Dr Eric Corty, from the Behrend College in Erie, Pennsylvania, said this was a situation “ripe for disappointment and dissatisfaction”.

“In the fantasy model of male sexuality, men have large penises, rock-hard erections, and can sustain sexual activity all night long,” Dr Corty wrote.

“It appears that many men and women hold this fantasy. The results from the present study, by providing a realistic not a fantasy model of sexuality, are useful both in treating people with sexual concerns and dysfunctions, and, with wider circulation, in preventing the onset of sexual dysfunctions.”

Dr Jane Howard, a Brisbane-based medical sex therapist, said there was a dearth of data on Australians’ expectation of sex.

Anecdotal evidence suggested most Australian women would be happy with the therapists’ “adequate” time of three to seven minutes, while men would not.

“There is a major gender difference in this area,” Dr Howard said.

“Usually women are quite happy with short intercourse, and are not bothered about prolonging it at all, but nearly all men want it to be much, much longer.”

She said it was important not to obsess over the length of intercourse, with time often suspended during the act anyway.

“I mean really, who’s counting?” the expert said.